The Two Edge Sword of Regulation

NOAH TODAY In the year 2011, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in America and said: "Once again, the earth has become wicked and over -populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me." "Build another  Ark and save 2 of every living thing along with a few good humans." He gave Noah the blueprints, saying: "You have 6 months to build the  Ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights." Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard - but no  Ark. "Noah!," He roared, "I'm about to start the rain! Where is the  Ark?" "Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed." "I needed a Building Permit." "I've been arguing with the Boat Inspector about the need for a sprinkler system." "My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood by-laws by building the  Ark in my back yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the local Planning Committee for a decision." "Then the local Council and the Electricity Company demanded a shed load of money for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the  Ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear none of it." "Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the Greater Spotted Barn Owl." "I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls - but no go!" "When I started gathering the animals the ASPCA took me to court. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodations were too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space." "Then the Environmental Agency ruled that I couldn't build the  Ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood." "I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew." "The Immigration Dept. is checking the visa status of most of the people who want to work." "The trade unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with Ark-building experience." "To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species." "So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this  Ark." "Suddenly the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky."  Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?" "No," said the Lord. " The Government beat me to it."

Joshua fit the battle of Jericho Jericho Jericho Joshua fit the battle of Jericho And the walls come tumbling down God knows that Joshua fit the battle of Jericho Jericho Jericho Joshua fit the battle of Jericho And the walls come tumbling down Good morning sister Mary Good morning brother John Well I wanna stop and talk with you Wanna tell you how I come along I know you've heard about Joshua He was the son of Nun He never stopped his work until Until the work was done God knows that Joshua fit the battle of Jericho Jericho Jericho Joshua fit the battle of Jericho And the walls come tumbling down You may talk about your men of Gideon You may brag about your men of Saul There's none like good old Joshua At the battle of Jericho Up to the walls of Jericho He marched with spear in hand Go blow them ram horns, Joshua cried 'Cause the battle is in my hands God knows that Joshua fit the battle of Jericho Jericho Jericho Joshua fit the battle of Jericho And the walls come tumbling down You may talk about your men of Gideon You may brag about your king of Saul There none like Joshua At the battle of Jericho They tell me, great God that Joshua's spear Was well nigh twelve feet long And upon his hip was a double edged sword And his mouth was a gospel horn Yet bold and brave he stood Salvation in his hand Go blow them ram horns Joshua cried 'Cause the devil can't do you no harm Joshua fit the battle of Jericho Jericho Jericho Joshua fit the battle of Jericho And the walls come tumbling down Up to the walls of Jericho He marched with spear in hand Go blow them ram horns, Joshua cried 'Cause the battle is in my hands Then the lamb ram sheep horns began to blow The trumpets began to sound Old Joshua shouted glory And the walls came tumblin' down God knows that Joshua fit the battle of Jericho Jericho Jericho Joshua fit the battle of Jericho And the walls come tumbling down Down, down, down, down, down Tumblin' down

More Politics=> Index
Click here to return to Petey and Petunia home page.